The GOOD Action Movies
What makes a Action Movie Good, Bad, or Ugly?Let's start with a few of The Good . . .
(Under Construction-may contain GLARING OMISSIONS . . . patience please, only links in BOLD are working)
• The RAMBO Series
I'd BE Rambo if I could be. Okay
I'm too afraid to be Rambo, but if I was Rambo, I wouldn't be
afraid of anything. He not just a soldier, he's an army. 3
words: wall of mud. He's so
capable and skilled that weapons seem like toys or accessories. It's a
little sad that he's an Vietnam vet and having a hard time in a
reality that doesn't involve killing . . .
"When you're
pushed, killing's as easy as breathing."
We
want someone to push him just to watch all hell break loose.
STALLONE! (Seriously—That's a sentence.)
All the
movies are great but Rambo III holds a special place in my heart.
First Blood, Rambo: First Blood Part II,
Rambo III,
Rambo (4),
and woo-hoo!
Rambo V coming in 2011! Nope, he changed his mind. Maybe he'll change it back again . . .
Never underestimate the appeal of blowing
shit up!
• The STAR WARS Series
I doooo love the action/space combo. It's so
Saturday-afternoon-matinee good! The first, first line
I ever learned: "They've shut down the main reactor . . ."
And just when you thought
it could not be any cooler: Imperial Walkers! And who
could ever top Darth Vader?! I still can't watch it without
thinking "This is so cool" the whole time. There are tons of
sites dedicated to it. You know and I know what's great about
it: EVERYTHING.
• The INDIANA JONES
Quadrilogy
The Bible of Adventure, Chapters 1, 2, 3, and 4.
The Book
of Genesis of the Comic Book Hero.
Raiders of the Lost Ark,
Temple of Doom,
Last Crusade, and
Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
• The ALIEN Quadrilogy
Aaaah, the Action-Adventure / Sci-Fi / Horror Combo Meal! Intergallatic
Size! Tasty.
As good as the first one was, the second proves a sequel can be
better.
However, Alien 3 disappointed us all (weren't you secretly hoping some how the crew in Aliens would come back to life—that is was all just a nightmare?).
Alien Resurrection grew on me.
Hated it at first but love it now, and it deserves special attention.
How cool is it that Sigourney Weaver actually made that
basketball shot?!
Alien,
Aliens,
Alien 3, and
Alien Resurrection
The first one was a masterpiece and should stand alone.
The second and third, while welcome and really good, never surpassed the first.
The Matrix, The Matrix Reloaded, and The Matrix Revolutions
The one and only. A movie so impressive, so poetic, so visually stunning, there could not be a follow-up. The absolute coolest look and sets of its time and for a long time after. Entering the theater to enter another world was never more satisfying than seeing this movie on the big screen. We were totally transported to an alien society and futuristic culture of clones and cops. The big argument about this movie is whether Harrison Ford's character knows he's a replicant or not. I think it's clear when Gaff leaves Deckard the origami unicorn, he's telling him he is, and this is why Deckard runs away with Rachel. What this life might be like for them and how much time they have are questions we kind of don't want answered (no sequel) because it parallels our own fear of death. We are all replicants because we don't know when our time will be, or when our memories will be washed away "like tears in the rain". A complete story (not an installment), a work of art that does and should stand alone.
• The TERMINATOR Quadrilogy
It doesn't get much more Bad Ass than this: After the semi
chasing the motorcycle crashes in the aqueduct and the T-2 emerges
through the flames
. . . as one audience member in my showing screamed out in
amazement and appreciation. . . "Unscathed!"
The Terminator,
Terminator 2, and
Terminator 3, and
Terminator Salvation
• The ROCK
"Welcome to The Rock!" Starring Nicolas Cage, Sean Connery, Ed Harris, Michael Biehn, David Morse, William Forsyth, John ("Dr. Cox")
McGinley, Danny Nucci, and more. This movie is WAY underrated. It has it all!
. . . and, Nicholas Cage's delivery is as entertaining as it gets.
Like so many action movies that followed, it's filmed in San
Francisco and on Alcatraz Island. Bruckheimer's best blockbuster.
(yes, that's Jim Carrey . . . )
• The DIRTY HARRY Series
Often (so often) imitated, but never equaled. The wise-ass, big-gun,
no-bullshit movie hero we all wish we could be, but don't have
Clint's attitude to pull off. I never get tired of
watching him chew on that hot dog while walking and shooting.
Can't a guy even grab a quick lunch? "Ketchup has no
business on a hot dog." (And, forgive me, Mr. Schwarzenegger, but it was a hot dog, not a hamburger.)
Dirty Harry,
Magnum Force,
Sudden Impact,
The Enforcer, and
Welcome to the Jungle
About as inconsistenly good or bad as the Batman movies. Loved the 2nd movie, and the 4th, but none of the others until 2009's tribute to the original TV Series that delivered everything you loved the original show for. Wrath of Khan owes much of its appeal to Ricardo Montalaban (sadly, every time I hear his name I hear "soft Corinthian leather") and to Moby Dick!
Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan (II), Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, and Star Trek
The Mutant idea is so cool . . . someday we may mutate into superheros. It's so easy to identify with being on the outside of society—when you're a teenager, you sometimes feel like a mutant. The whole series owes a great deal of its appeal to the comic books of course, but Hugh Jackman's intensity and the special effects are the bulk of it for me.
X-Men, X2, X-Men: The Last Stand, and
X-Men Origins: Wolverine
• The CHRONICLES OF RIDDICK Series
That's right: "Richard B. Riddick, convicted felon, murderer."
The bad guy as good guy. "You made 3 mistakes . . ."
One of the most quotable series ever. And an airborne, spinning,
double-bladed decapitation! What a fight scene!! If you're
not overly impressed, then give Vin Diesel the credit for making
it look possible.
Pitch Black,
The Chronicles of Riddick, (they
also made the animated: The Chronicles of Riddick: Dark Fury),
and
Riddick 3 in the works!
• PREDATOR
They're really big men with really big guns, and they're scared—what chance do you have? "GO! RUN!! Get to the chopper!"
"Get to da chappaaaa!" "Bill-lee get me a way outta dis hohl" Pred-da-ta
has got to be one of the best-ever Arnold-accent movies! So quotable, so cool. It doesn't get any better than this! The
MUSIC!!! The creature—Stan Winston's genius (RIP) "If it bleeds, we can kill it."
Apparently not. (What a piece of crap Predator 2 was.)
"We move. Five-meter spread. No sound."
• PREDATORS
At last, an enjoyable sequel, kicking it up a notch.
HoMyGod, PREDATORS
is finally in theatres. Back to the Jungle,
baby!
"Over here . . . over here . . . Excellent!"
• JASON and the ARGONAUTS
For its time (1963), this movie had so many cool special effects that
it still holds up today. For me it was all about the
skeletons. This movie (plus "kung fu" movies and "The Bridge On
The River Kwai" and "Force 10 From Navarrone" and
. . . ) probably started
my love of action movies. The action is freakily good (and
awesomely timed) considering a lot of it is stop motion.
If you've never seen it, I have no doubt you'll love it. It's
the kind of Saturday afternoon movie that kept you inside when
it wasn't raining. Yesterday's Clash of
the Titans.
• 300
A beautifully stylized look at ancient warfare and a moving
portrayal of a mythical battle, 300 is a love affair with
the male form and athleticism: graceful strength and a ballet of death.
This movie celebrates the stuff the legend was made of: a last
stand fight of raw power, and dieing with honor despite being
impossibly outnumbered. (plus holy shitness on the
killing and violence level!)
• STARSHIP TROOPERS
The oh-so-pretty Casper Van Dien, and my favorite female character "Dizzy" Flores.
A great movie followed by
Roughnecks: The Starship Troopers Chronicles an
addicting CGI TV series with
a killer intro.
(Sadly, Starship
Troopers 2 should have just been a play, not a sci-fi movie, and
Starship Troopers 3: Marauder was released straight to DVD.)
• The TRANSPORTER Triology
I have to count the "Taxi" series too but the Frenchies finally got in
the game with this every man's Bond, James Bond. "Rule Number 2: No Names."
Yeah, he's too cool for that shit. (Real stunt work!
Impressive!!)
The Transporter,
Transporter 2, and
Transporter 3
• NINJA ASSASSIN
A virtuoso performance by Jong Ji-hoon aka "Rain" as "Raizo".
One of the most intense opening scenes ever, the
blood-splatter title set the tone on this freight train to
injury. Raizo takes a beating and then some. Seems as much about
what he can take as what he can dish out, but you have to dish
more to win, and does he! A full sampling of fighting skills and
weapons are on display. I just kept thinking "One wrong move and
something or someone's getting sliced for real. The ending/fight
scene features fire as a character in breathtaking shot after
breathtaking shot. Rain, Yuen Woo Ping, and 87eleven set the bar
really high with this one.
• EXCALIBUR
Like beauty seen only in dreams! The scenery, the armor, the
actors/characters, the colors of the sky, the sense of mystery
and the mystical. Of course, a truly great story to begin with
but what a vision of it. The
knights on horses thundering through the alee of cherry blossoms
to "O Fortuna" was pure magic . . . as in the charm of
making "Anál nathrach, orth’ bháis’s bethad, do chél dénmha"
uh-huh. Well, that clears it up. Sounded like ah nal nahd
drrrach ooothbas bethood dockiel tienveh to me. This movie is
the stuff childhood fantasies are made of. It enchants
every time I watch it. Nicol Williamson as Merlin steals
the show. LOVE love love narrated movies.
They have a more personal, I'm-telling-you-a-story feeling.
• ROBOCOP
Nice legs! It seemed like people thought of it
as a 'cute little movie' but it has become a cult classic.
People LOVE it. As recently as Cop Out, Tracy Morgan used
a line from it as part of his hilarious homage (hommidge)
scenes.
Part of it must be our fascination with robots and machines, and maybe the robot dance (LOL) because the way he moves is a big part of the appeal. The rest must be his total UNSTOPPABILITY! He's the kind of cop cops need to be. Shot at him, it won't do you any good. There's a sense of humor to the whole thing, especially when the bigger machine gets taken out. The biggest part of why we loved him was (of course) the machine's humanity—It's still the cop who died under there, and he remembers who killed him. Peter Weller has a great face for this and an awesome voice. His voice adds as much to it as Harrison Ford's does to Blade Runner. The movie didn't take itself too seriously and that's why it worked. They were having fun, we were having fun. It was one of those campy cool '80s movies like Runaway starring Tom Selleck and Gene Simmons. For sheer action, it's still fun to watch on a Saturday afternoon.
It helps that it was directed by Paul
Verhoeven (Total Recall and Starship Troopers).
"Dead or alive, you're coming with me!"
The Car Chase/Race series with the best cars and a Skankapalooza.
"Muscle beats Import, every time."
The Fast and The Furious, 2 Fast 2 Furious,
The Fast & The Furious: Tokyo Drift, and
Fast & Furious
• TRANSFORMERS
Transformers kicked ass! When Scorponok comes out of the
sand . . . and when Barricade gets a running start and
transforms into the police car in mid-air it's worth the
whole movie! The Autobots vs. Decepticons thing is great, and in the
movie you know everyone was just waiting to see the Deceptions.
The bad guys are definitely the cooler machines. After watching
the original Transformers cartoon series, I became the BIGGEST fan
of the sequel "Beast Wars"! Optimus Prime, Megatron (the best evil sarcastic bad-ass ever),
Waspenator, Rat Trap, Scorponok, Dinobot . . . Maximals versus
Predacons. Doubt it would make as good a movie series though.
(Everyone hated the second one. How bad was it? This bad.)